All business

I have found my new tribe. Well, they were my people for about 24 hours, at least. You can recognise us by our uniform, a pair of grey pyjamas with a black kangaroo emblazoned on the front of the shirt. (One of life’s great equalisers – truly, everyone looks terrible when they return from the bathroom with these pjs on.)

You may also spot our HQ, we call it a lounge, far from the busy airport food courts, where it is perfectly acceptable to pop the champagne – even though it’s not quite 8am. That’s just how we roll. When in transit, this pyjama’d tribe resides in the upstairs cabin, while the normal folk cram in downstairs. And it was a big bus this time – an A380 from Sydney to LA.

I was fortunate to be able to use frequent flyer points to upgrade to the dizzy heights of business class, where the beds are flat, the cutlery is metal, and the menu is totes fancy. Except vegetarians don’t get to choose from the menu, so lunch was an entree of felafel bathed in hommus and surrounded by baby spinach, followed by tandoori tofu (yep), Dahl and cauliflower and other assorted veges. An interesting choice of strong flavours and daring ingredients for people cooped up in this plane for the next 12 hours… Oh, and dessert was a chocolate mousse sort of thing with churros. Well played, Qantas.

Then they switch the lights out in an elaborate trick to get you to sleep, even though your brain is screaming, IT’S ONLY MIDDAY, MAN! Yet most of the tribe seem to sleep, with only one snorer and a little baby to break the silence. And even they seemed to do so in a dignified, restrained sort of manner. There’s an interesting mix of humanity here, as there was in the lounge. Young children who are clearly seasoned travellers don’t bat an eye as they settle back and enjoy travelling in style. If you kids only knew how the rest of us normally travel…

This is the life, I tell you – hopefully I get upgraded on the way home too, or I might have to wear these pjs in Economy and reminisce.