Look, I’m no Dr Doolittle or Cesar Milan (I think that is the Dog Whisperer guy’s name), and yes, my own dog Goldie is in fact made of synthetic fibres. But even I can work out what the pug dog in this picture is saying. He is saying SAVE ME. This ‘custom snuggly dog hat’ is knitted by a lady in America, who has a shop on etsy dedicated to dog hats of various styles, colours and levels of humiliation.
From the mildly disturbing football-fan look on the left to the Parisienne style modelled on the right, this shop has a fabulous collection of photos that are just waiting to be made into a coffee table book. (Honestly, I found it hard to choose the pics for this post – there is an aviator hat complete with knitted goggles, a piglet hat and a flower child hat, to name just a few.) I know that people love their dogs (or ‘fur children’ as they are sometimes called), but I’m not sure that this is the way to show your affection for your pooch. Although maybe I’m totally wrong and there are fierce walk-offs at dog parks all over the world, with fashionista pups strutting down the (ahem) catwalks, vying for the attention and approval of other dogs and their ‘fur-less parents’. Maybe dogs love fashion as much as some humans and maybe they also like to look glamorous while keeping their heads warm. Maybe.
But I suggest that the Punk Rock Mohawk Hat is a step too far. Although, I shouldn’t judge – maybe dogs love robbing banks and starting fires and punching on in riots as much as some humans. In which case, when you stock up on this balaclava-esque hat for your fur child, you might want to check out the range of doggie suits for the Court date that surely awaits…
Jessica’s knitted hats for pugs (how’s that for a niche market?!) are on etsy and her shop is definitely worth a look. Even if you don’t have a (real) dog.
When I first saw this photo, I was curious. Why is a guy dressed like Santa asleep against a tree, with a snake crawling over him? And what kind of product is this actually trying to sell? But the clever marketing ploy worked and I clicked through to find out more. I’m still not sure what to make of it. I don’t live in a particularly cold climate, so maybe this scarf is actually a really good idea and I just can’t see it. (Now that I know it definitely is a scarf, and not some sort of snake.)
The design is based on the story of Rip Van Winkle – a story that I probably should know, but am afraid that I do not. Something about a man falling asleep for 100 years, but I’m not sure who he was or why he did it or what the message for kids would be (get enough rest?) so I hope you are better informed than I am.
Anyways, this scarf beard is knitted with a wool/acrylic blend yarn and changes colours from black to grey to oatmeal to white. I take it that Rip Van Winkle wasn’t a particularly colourful chap. The designer claims that it can be worn at full length or wrapped around the neck for extra warmth. Um, I don’t mean to be picky, but this scarf beard IS 8.5 METERES LONG. I am not sure how you could wear that at full length, but if you do, please don’t catch a train. Or ride a bike. Or go through one of those revolving doors. Or get in an elevator. Look, if you are wearing the scarf beard at full length, best you just stay at home, weirdo.
The designer says this is a great gift “for the man who has everything or for the lady who complains of a cold face.” And presumably a great gift for people who like the challenge of carrying woollen tyres around their necks. If you know someone who fits any of those categories, you should check out Alexa’s shop on etsy.
I like fire. Not in a call-the-police, lock-up-your-matches kind of way, but I do like being around fireplaces, especially in winter. The problem is that I live in an apartment, so any fire here is probably not going to be a relaxing, toasting marshmallows kind of affair. More like a mad dash to grab the photos, grab the icecream-maker, grab some chocolate and run. So I was excited to see these bizarre looking fire bowls on Fab.com – they’re made by Lumacast and they cost around $3,000 for a 32 inch ‘fire wok’. I like the idea of carrying the bowl over to the dining table to scare guests who think that you’ve overdone the Masterchef flambe and burnt their dinner, but apparently these handcrafted concrete bowls are meant for patio use only. Though since my balcony isn’t gigantic and already features one gas-powered fire machine (which also cooks delicious food), I think this will have to wait til I’m grown up and living in my dream house. With a hi-tech sprinkler system installed, just in case.
Given that it’s the week leading up to St Patrick’s Day and we should be celebrating all things Irish, I thought I’d continue the theme with another great find from the treasure trove that is etsy. This “St Patrick’s Day Inspired Beard Beanie” is extraordinary and would make the perfect gift for any child, or person with a small head who wants to disguise their face. Created by Jamie in the USA, this is a practical way to keep children warm in the cold weather. And to scare their little friends and confuse their teachers and aging grandparents. Order your beanies from Momma B’s Hat House & More on etsy.
Wherever you stand on the whole animal fur debate, this Silver Wolf Foks (yes, that’s how they spell it, they’re from Poland) is a-ok. Whether you’re inspired by the recent Liam Neeson scary movie or you’re just an animal loving fashionista, this is surely a must-have addition to your wardrobe/menagerie. Part pet, part scarf and all felt, with a special clip so that you can curl ol’ Foksy around your neck or leave him hanging free. From the new Felt Fokses range by wacky Polish designers Celapiu, you can pick one up via their fabulous etsy store for around $150. The designers claim that the Long Foks version is “long enough to wrap himself around you in hundreds of different ways”, which sounds at once creepy and impossible. Whatever, I am very tempted to carry one of these around Sydney this winter. And I will sidle up close to people on public transport and in bars and tap them gently with one of Foksy’s paws. And wait for the screams.
If you must have a Foks, check out Celapiu’s etsy store.